{"id":2058,"date":"2019-08-09T08:14:40","date_gmt":"2019-08-09T06:14:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/shirasade.net\/fiction\/?p=2058"},"modified":"2019-08-11T08:23:54","modified_gmt":"2019-08-11T06:23:54","slug":"a-butterfly-flaps-its-wings","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/shirasade.net\/fiction\/a-butterfly-flaps-its-wings\/","title":{"rendered":"A Butterfly Flaps Its Wings"},"content":{"rendered":"
This entry is in the series Shadowhunter AUs<\/a><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n

Author's Note: Day 9 of Writer's Month 2019<\/a> - prompt: time travel. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

So this is most definitely NOT a drabble anymore, but rather me using a) my dissatisfaction with 3b and b) something Dom said at ItaCon 1* to spin a tale in which not much happens, yet everything changes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Title alludes to the Butterfly Effect<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

When Jace returned from his last training session with Alec, there was a strange Shadowhunter in his room.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Who\n are you and what do you want?\" Jace's hand immediately went to his \nblade, but the intruder didn't seem bothered in the least. On the \ncontrary, he was leaning casually against the wall and watching Jace \nwith a look that could only be described as fond<\/em>. Jace's \nhackles rose, and he did his best to hide how unsettled he felt. There \nwas something about the stranger... something familiar. \"Are you going \nto explain yourself or do I have to make you?\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Oh, I'd like to see you try!\" The stranger had the gall to laugh<\/em>,\n only to quickly turn sober when he saw that Jace was about to reach the\n end of his tether. \"Seriously, though, you know me. Better than just \nabout anyone. Just... look closely.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

With that the stranger \nstepped out of the shadows - and Jace's breath caught. He was about ten \nyears older, there were more runes marking his skin and his hair was \nlonger, but one glance into his eyes left no room for doubt: Jace was \nlooking at...<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Me? You're... me<\/em>? From... from the future<\/em>?\" he stammered, \"How is that even possible?\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The\n unmistakable blue-and-gold eyes twinkled in amusement. \"Let's just say \nthat Seelie portals are more versatile than we thought.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"How do I\n know you're not just wearing a glamour?\" After the first shock had \npassed, Jace managed to gather his composure at least superficially. \nStill, he couldn't quite hide the flinch when the other Jace took a step\n forward. Shaking his head in annoyance, he braced himself - he would \nnot show weakness, not even if this was really some future version of \nhimself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Va... Michael Wayland used to break our fingers when we \nmade a mistake playing the piano.\" Any trace of good humor had \ndisappeared with the statement, the older man's voice carrying a sadness\n Jace recognized all too well. \"You haven't even told Alec about that, \nhave you? At least not yet.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jace nodded mutely. Alec knew more \nabout his childhood before his father's death than just about anyone, \nbut he hadn't shared this particular tidbit. It always felt strangely \ndisloyal when he mentioned things that he knew other people would find \nharsh. Unwilling to pursue this line of thought further, he quickly \nasked, \"Then why are you here? Won't this change things?\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"That's \nwhat I'm hoping.\" The older Jace's smile was wry, bittersweet, and his \nposture slumped, as if he was carrying the weight of the world on his \nshoulders. Then he shook it off with a careless shrug, hiding all those \nemotions behind a facade that Jace had only ever seen in the mirror. \n\"Actually, my presence should result in a new timeline, not affecting my\n own. Or so I've been told by certain people who've seen way too many \nmundie movies.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Then my question still stands,\" Jace said impatiently, \"why<\/em> the fuck are you here?\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Angel,\n was I really that much of a pain in the ass?\" the older man asked under\n his breath, but continued before Jace could interject, \"I'm not going \nto tell you what's going to happen in the future, but I am<\/em> going to tell you one thing, and I suggest you listen carefully.\" <\/p>\n\n\n\n

He paused and waited for Jace to nod in reluctant acknowledgment. \"Okay, I'm listening.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The future version of himself sighed and finally got to the point: \"This is the thing: You love Alec.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Yes,\n of course,\" Jace replied rather offhandedly, confused as to why this \nwas supposed to be a revelation. \"That's why I asked...\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"...him to be your parabatai, yeah, I'm aware,\" interrupted the older Jace wearily. \"But what I'm telling you is that you love<\/em> him. Love him in the way V... Michael told you was weakness.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jace\n dimly registered that once more the other him had put a strange \nemphasis on his father's name, but most of his thoughts were occupied \nwith the rest of this astonishing statement. It was of course completely\n ridiculous - Alec was his best friend, his almost-brother, his \nparabatai-to-be. Anything else was outrageous.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"You don't know what you're talking about,\" he snapped. \"I'm... we're<\/em> not like that!\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Oh,\n but you are.\" The most infuriating thing about this whole situation was\n the matter-of-fact way in which the older Shadowhunter spoke. As if he \nknew Jace better than he knew himself. \"And by you<\/em> I mean both of you.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"I- what<\/em>?!\" Jace felt as if his brain was about to shortcircuit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Have\n you ever wondered why Alec hesitated when you asked him to be \nparabatai?\" Future Jace was again regarding him a tenderness that set \nJace's teeth on edge. \"I should probably feel guilty to share his \nsecret, but it seems that's the only way to get through to you: He's in \nlove with you. Has been for a long time - but if you don't do something \nnow, you'll lose him one day.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"No, I won't,\" Jace interjected, but even he could hear the doubt creeping into his voice. \"We'll be parabatai forever.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n \"Of course, and that's so much more incredible than you can ever \nimagine.\" There was no missing the bone-deep sadness settling over the \nolder man's shoulders now. \"Except one day you'll wake up and you'll be \nalone. Yes, you'll still be parabatai, but he'll be on the other side of\n the world, building a life - with someone else.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Alec would never...\" Jace protested weakly. \"Nephilim only love once.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Maybe.\n Maybe not.\" The older him's understanding was like salt being rubbed \ninto a wound, and Jace had to fight the urge to cover his ears or run \naway. \"But that doesn't change the fact that he'll move on.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"What...\n what should I do?\" Jace barely registered that he was talking as if he \nbelieved every word, fear spreading through his veins like ice. He \ncouldn't... he wouldn't<\/em> lose Alec!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A relieved smile \nspread on future Jace's face. \"I thought I'd made that clear: go to him \nand tell him that you love him, too. You might have to kiss him for him \nto believe you, but I think that won't be a problem, will it.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It \nwasn't a question, and Jace's cheeks suddenly felt very hot, the truth \nof this statement sinking in. No, he really wouldn't mind kissing Alec. \nBut... \"But what about the parabatai ceremony? The Law says-\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"-many\n things, some of them more relevant than others.\" Older Jace paused, \ngaze turning inwards for a moment. \"Look, I'm not telling you one way or\n the other. Just... tell Alec and then you can decide together.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Alec always follows the rules,\" Jace murmured petulantly, making the other him laugh.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Oh,\n I don't know... when it comes to you - let's say he might just surprise\n you.\" Checking his watch, the older man stepped closer and clapped a \nhand on Jace's shoulder. \"Alright, I've said my piece, and it's time for\n me to go. Everything else is up to you.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Surprisingly, Jace felt almost disappointed that this strange encounter was about to end. \"Can't you tell me anything else?\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"No, sorry.\" Future Jace's voice softened. \"Just remember, even when it doesn't feel that way, you're loved.\" <\/p>\n\n\n\n

A\n portal swooshed into being in a corner of the room, and the older Jace \nturned to leave. Just before he stepped through, however, he said over \nhis shoulder, \"And never lie to Alec. No matter what, even if you think \nthat you're protecting him.\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Before Jace could do more than open \nhis mouth to ask why the hell he'd ever do such a thing, the portal \nclosed behind his visitor, disappearing as if it had never been there. \nJace remained rooted to the spot for a long moment, staring at the empty\n air and replaying the whole bizarre encounter. Did this really happen? \nWas there really a future version of himself who decided that of all the\n things to do with a time travel portal was to tell himself to... to confess his love<\/em> to Alec?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The\n strangest thing about the whole thing was that, the more Jace thought \nabout it, the less strange it seemed, a dozen little details he'd \nnoticed about Alec's behavior slotting into place, as did some truths of\n his own that he'd never dared to look at too closely. Still, should he \nreally go through with this crazy scheme? Wouldn't it be easier to \nsimply not<\/em> tell Alec and follow the original plan?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Except he could still hear the other Jace's voice in his head: Never lie to Alec. Even if you think that you're protecting him.<\/em> And not telling Alec would be lying by omission, five minutes after he'd been scandalized by the very thought. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Taking a deep breath, Jace nodded to himself. He knew what to do. Setting his shoulders, he left his room to go find Alec.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

***<\/p>\n\n\n\n

On the other side of the portal, Jace stumbled, disoriented, only to be caught in a strong embrace.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Missed\n you,\" Alec's voice rumbled against his ear, and Jace stared into his \nparabatai's face as memories began to fill his head. Warmth spreading \nthrough him, Jace laughed in delight, and Alec kissed him - for the \nfirst and the hundredth time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He was home.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

*To clarify: During his M&G at ItaCon 1 Dom said something along the lines that everyone's lives would have been much easier if Jace had been with Alec in season 1 instead of Clary. When asked about the parabatai taboo, he said that Jace should have realised his feelings before the ceremony and told Alec. As you can tell, I couldn't bring myself to break the parabatai bond but rather took advantage of the show not once addressing the taboo by making it simply another stupid Law. \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This entry is in the series Shadowhunter AUs<\/a><\/div><\/div><\/div>

When Jace returned from his last training session with Alec, there was a strange Shadowhunter in his room.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_s2mail":"yes","footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[228,197],"tags":[294,299,307],"series":[325],"class_list":["post-2058","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-alec-lightwoodjace-wayland","category-shadowhunters","tag-audience-all","tag-genre-slash","tag-warning-au","series-shadowhunter-aus"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/shirasade.net\/fiction\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2058","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/shirasade.net\/fiction\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/shirasade.net\/fiction\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/shirasade.net\/fiction\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/shirasade.net\/fiction\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2058"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/shirasade.net\/fiction\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2058\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2060,"href":"https:\/\/shirasade.net\/fiction\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2058\/revisions\/2060"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/shirasade.net\/fiction\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2058"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/shirasade.net\/fiction\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2058"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/shirasade.net\/fiction\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2058"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/shirasade.net\/fiction\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=2058"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}